Thursday, November 18, 2004

my very own "bridget jones moment"

i'm not one to get easily embarrassed, but today was my lucky day. due to the fact that i worked at a christian summer camp, i have some fairly crazy tan lines. most of them are faded, but still very visable. and the fact that i'm in a wedding in less than a month wearing a dress that would definitely reveal my horrible tan lines, means i've been going to the tanning bed (i don't want to hear criticism for this!). my mom and i have this goal to get up in the morning, go to the tanning bed, then do something productive (like walk) and then eat breakfast and complete other other daily tasks. sounds really eventful, believe me, i know. well...this morning i wasn't feeling good (i've actually been sick for about a week now). my allergies have been nuts and my medicine isn't helping a whole lot. anyway, i really didn't sleep good last night because i was up half the night coughing. i was really comfy when it was time to get up and i just wanted to lay there all day. i could hear my mom upstairs vaccuuming and walking around. after a LONG time of laying around, i got up and got ready. this really only consisted of washing my face and brushing my teeth. i didn't see the point of trying to look nice to go tan. i felt like crap, and when a person feels this way, their appearance usually reflects it. so needless to say, i'm not looking too hot. i put on a baggy tee shirt and some old jeans and my GLASSES! i never go out in public wearing them unless i absolutely have to because i hate them. as we get out of the car to go into the tanning bed place, i look at my mom and say "i can't believe i'm seriously going out in public like this." to which she replies, "it's just the tanning bed, amy." 15 seconds later we're inside the store and who is sitting there getting her nails done...my ex-boyfriend's mom. ugh. not someone you want to see when you're not looking your best. at that very second i wanted the floor to swallow me up. she saw my mom before she saw me. "we were just talking about you." i heard her say. then she saw me. i was half hidden by this large cut out cardboard advertisement and i liked it that way. "hey" i said as i was trying to decide if it was all really happening. i reached for the pen to sign in, "are you ignoring me?" she asked. oh my goodness. yes. yes, i am. i couldn't say anything...i was completely embarrassed. i finally stepped around the cardboard cut out and stood there so embarrassed. i was standing in front of a huge mirror that was hanging on the wall (used for haircuts) and all i could think of was "i can't believe i stepped out of the house like this." after hearing the rundown of my exboyfriend, his brother, and the rest of her family, it was time to answer some questions of my own. they went something along the lines of this...
married? haha. no. yes, i graduated last december (i'm still thankful she didn't ask what i'm doing now). no, i don't talk to anyone else from here except brooke. yes, my dad is doing okay. yes, i did hear so and so was getting married.
i was ready to close myself up in the room and tan, and GO HOME! a bed was ready, i was saved, but not before being invited to stop by on thanksgiving(what? my thoughts exactly). i was also told that he wouldn't be bringing a girl home with him (not sure if that was to insinuate that he is single, or just a mere fact). she said her feelings would be hurt if i didn't stop by and that she knew he would love to see me. i think if he'd love to see me, i probably would still be in contact with him. but that's just my opinion. i mean, we did break up 5 years ago.

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