Monday, August 02, 2004

camp's over...sad day

okay, so camp is over and i'm at my mom's house. it's not the most ideal place for me to be right now, but i know that God has a wonderful plan in store for me...and i'm confident in the fact that i am exactly where he wants me right now at this very point in my life. i just want to reflect a little on camp as i'm sure i will randomly thoughout the next couple weeks.
leaving camp was very "bittersweet." i had an amazing summer, i met some incredible people, and i had many wonderful experiences, but i am now ready for whatever the next chapter in my life brings. looking back i am definitely able to see growth. how much i've grown in my walk with christ over the past 4 years is so obvious. i received mail from brooke throughout the summer and i realized that her letters and the things going on in her life could have been me. 5 years ago we were almost the exact same person...now it's hard for me to even understand why she would want to do things i hear her talking about. but i ultimately know that it's because of my relationship with Christ. while she was off partying in florida, and juggling dates with 3 different guys, and working at a job she hates, i was in charleston teaching bible study, showing the love of Christ to kids who had never heard of Jesus, and trying to glorify God through everything i did. when i look at it like that, my heart breaks because she is so resistant to even hearing anything about God at all. i was very broken for her all summer long as we focused on the lost. and i can't help but praise God for my salvation and for who he has molded me to be.
the last night my staff was all together, matt came up to be and gave me a huge hug. he told me that he loved me and he was going to miss me and then he preceded to tell me that he appreciated my servant heart and humility and my passion for my kids and my students. i seriously almost lost it. it took me back to mobile, my first summer of camp, where i was young, spiritually immature, and i had no idea what i was doing. i watched people on my staff and how they served with such humility. i would visit them on site with my video camera and capture their passion for their kids and i would capture visuals of them serving our Lord...and i would think to myself..."i want that!" honestly, that is the whole reason i wanted to be a track leader. i wanted kids that i could invest in...i wanted to serve God in whatever way i could. so, two summers later there i was in a position to do just that. by matt telling me that he saw those characteristics in me i can look and see where my life was and where i am now and praise God for the way i have been growing over the past 2 years and through the 3 summers i've worked camp. it's something i never would have noticed or thought much about, but through other people, God reveals his mighty ways and how he works.

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